I can no longer ignore it or push it aside. The time has come. My pulse races, my heart beats out of my chest, the light is too bright the dark is too loud. As I try to calm myself I search into the recesses of my mind to make a list, a triage of executable tasks, that take order in what i can do now and what must be done right away. Everything is happening at once but I am still expected to go about life as normal, or at least complete what has always been required of me. Friday. The date looms near and i want to shrink away from it. Hide from it. Or at least freeze time so that I have enough time to get everything done. This may seem a little ambiguous. Maybe a lot. The purpose of this blog is to track my experiences studying abroad and the process starts at home. Unfortunately all the forms and required documentation are all due at the same time that all of my classes are playing catch up or unleashing the heaviest of loads. I can barely take it. There is a light at the end of this tunnel though. 3 more weeks. Then this uneasy existence is solidified and I am done with this institution for now.

For my first time abroad I will head of to the cheery and sunny land of london, England. I am excited.  Beyond excited. This will be my first time traveling abroad on my own. I am scared, confused, and anxious. But I’m supposed to be happy and care free, right? why does life feel like a part time job I need to quit right now? UGH! This is why I read. Escapism is my art.

Important things:

My interview is done. Although I woke up late and was interviewed 30 minutes late, Dr. H seemed not too addled by it. I stressed out for the entire week thinking that I totally messed up my interview. I mean, who would want an intern that can’t even show up on time for an interview? It was the first time I’d EVER been late for an interview. Promptness is important with first impressions and I totally interviewed without washing my face or anything. It’s a good thing it was a skype interview. Gosh that woman has the patience of a saint.

I. GOT. THE. INTERNSHIP! Wait whaaaaat what? They want me? Why? what trickery unfolded between my internship coordinator and Dr. H? Whatever. I’ll know when I get there. Now the money is due. Oh dear gosh. I guess I’m setting up my gofundme today. Maybe they’ll let me work while I’m there so that I can have some pocket money? Hopefully. sigh

Song choice for today: Ode to sleep – twenty one pilots

Random thought:

Matchmaker: Recite the final admonition.

Mulan: -Blank stare-


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